For many families, moving an aging parent into their home makes sense. The move is best for their financial situation, they can oversee their parent’s health and they avoid the concerns of their loved one living alone or moving to an unfamiliar community. However, moving a parent into one’s home is still a complicated transition, one that should be taken seriously and planned for in advance to ensure everyone is as comfortable as possible.
Alison Wall, Senior Living Consultant at TreVista Antioch, an assisted living and memory care community in Antioch, CA, says, “When an older parent moves in with an adult child and their family, it requires an adjustment for everyone. Even if relationships are healthy, living together can cause tension – not to mention the financial and logistical changes involved with the move.
“It can take some time for families to work out the kinks of adding another person to their household, but if everyone goes into the transition with open minds and a willingness to compromise, they’re more likely to witness the rewards of multigenerational living than be overwhelmed by its complications.”
Considerations for Moving a Parent In
Moving an aging parent into your home involves much more than giving them your guest bedroom. Adding another person to your home will alter everything from daily schedules to transportation, privacy, expenses and more. The retirement experts at AARP® suggest several things to consider in order to prepare yourself and your family for the move.
- Does your home accommodate their needs? You’ll need to consider whether your home not only has enough space for another person but also if it suits your parent’s abilities. Will you need to renovate the home in any way to include an extra bathroom or an exterior ramp? Consider what changes will need to be made now, but also what might need to change if their needs differ in the future. If your parent is bringing a pet with them, consider how your home will accommodate a(nother) animal.
- Will you provide personal care support? If your parent is moving in with you so you can take care of them, consider how much support you’ll be providing. Is caregiving something that can fit into your daily schedule, or will you need to adjust your work and social life? If you need to travel, will your parent go with you or will you use respite care? Are you prepared to take on the role of caregiver? What if their healthcare needs extend beyond what you feel you can care for? Who can help you with care tasks – your spouse, children or siblings?
- Will they bring their car? If your parent still drives, transportation may not be much of a concern for their new lifestyle. However, if they can no longer drive themselves, you’ll need to adjust your family’s schedules to ensure your loved one can go to appointments and go on social outings. Consider whether public transportation is an option.
- Will they help out financially? You will want to discuss finances with your parent prior to moving them in. Come to an agreement on whether they will help pay for living expenses with their income or savings. Although moving in with a child is much cheaper than moving to a senior living community, costs will still add up in the forms of home renovations, groceries and utility expenses.
- How healthy are your relationships? Even if you and your parent are close, living together after spending decades in separate houses can bring old or new issues to the surface. Both of you have your own routines and preferences, as well as political, religious and personal beliefs and ideas that may not match with the other. Are you prepared to live peacefully together day after day? Also consider if there are any unresolved issues between your parent and your spouse or children. If you have any concerns about this move disrupting the emotional peace of your family, it’s best to discuss these prior to the move and try to resolve issues before your parent moves in.
- How will they adjust to your neighborhood? Remember that it may be difficult for your parent to give up their independence and move into a new place. They may feel like they’re intruding or not feel like they belong in your home at first. They may also have left behind beloved neighbors and friends, favorite stores or landmarks. Consider how your parent will adjust to your neighborhood and think of how you can help ease the transition. Before the move, help your parent locate new shopping venues, banks, doctor’s offices or places of worship (if they aren’t already familiar with your town), or take them to visit your local senior center.
With You Through the Journey
Moving your parent into your home can be a major life adjustment for everyone involved. However, if you plan ahead and work through any foreseeable problems, you can help to smooth the transition and live happily with your parent as a member of your household.
If you’re beginning to provide personal care for your loved one, and you could use some guidance, TreVista Antioch would be happy to offer support. We gladly provide educational events for caregiving families and offer advice and guidance for individual situations. If caregiving has you concerned, reach out to our team to learn how we can support you through this next phase of your life.
Making the everyday extraordinary.
Family-owned and operated, Agemark Senior Living is the new owner of TreVista Antioch. Known for creating warm, welcoming communities, vibrant lifestyles and engaging programming, Agemark has been one of the most premier and trusted senior living providers since 1987. As Agemark’s newest community, TreVista Antioch is located on 10 acres in a prime location close to shopping and local attractions, as well as the great outdoors. Our beautiful community features a personalized, resident-centric approach to care that provides support, all while helping residents live full, connected lives.
At TreVista Antioch, we provide assisted living and memory care set in a beautiful environment that not only meets our residents’ needs but makes them, as well as their families, feel more at home. Although our gorgeous community is a plus, we truly believe it’s our programming and caring, dedicated staff that makes TreVista home. With our family-oriented inspiration and resident-centric approach, our residents flourish and experience days full of joy and meaning. Our staff learns each resident’s likes and dislikes and their values and pasts, right down to the dreams they never thought they could accomplish, in order to customize their care and make their dreams a reality.
LifeCycles wellness programming encourages our residents to connect, engage and enjoy life, every day. Our LifeCycles programming is designed to focus on the four dimensions of wellness: physical, social, spiritual and intellectual. This is achieved through a wide range of daily activities and routines, from outings and excursions to local events and programming at the community. At TreVista Antioch, our residents have the tools and care they need to make each day fulfilling, engaging and vibrant. Contact us to learn more!
Call us at 925•237•1952 for more information or to schedule a personal visit today.
TreVista Antioch is part of the Agemark family of senior living communities.